Day 13: Gulp! The possibility of meeting new pals

Ok, I'm feeling much, much better and back on track!

Somehow I got my groove on with cleaning, and kinda went to town on the house. I vacuumed the cat tree for literally an hour trying to get all their crazy, fine-ass fur off that carpet. I emptied and scrubbed all the litter boxes and vacuumed the rooms they're in (yes, boxES and roomS). I de-molded the shower stall and scoured it to death otherwise. I consolidated the stuff I already had for Goodwill and then made another pass - especially through my book, movie and music collections - to accumulate more donations. After that, I scrubbed myself clean, did a bit of shopping and then attended my GirlFriendCircles Connecting Circle. Gulp.

I found GirlFriendCircles via Meetup, which I was perusing about a month ago. I knew it was time to find places to meet new friends and had heard Meetup is a great way to find something you like to do (in a group setting) and thus, probably meet new friends. That day I signed up for the book club and, having found GFC listed as a Meetup and navigated over to their actual website, signed up for GirlFriendCircles as well. I was "having a yes moment", as Honey Bunny would say.

Attending a Connecting Circle is a mandatory part of being a GFC member. It's to verify that you're a woman and that you're over 21 by having you come together in a public setting (usually a wine bar) with five other women for an hour and a half chit-chat session. Afterwards you fill out a survey that asks you to verify that you went, who the other women were, so on and so forth, and then (and only then!) you have access to the full spectrum of stuff that GFC has to offer. In addition to verification, it breaks the ice for you to meet other women in this type of forced setting.

My CC was in Nob Hill, not my favorite... parking sucks and I've never found much of interest in Nob Hill except for the top of the hill: Grace Cathedral, The Tonga Room at the Fairmont, and the little park between the two where my friends Ivy and Mark got married. I feared that because I cancelled my first Connecting Circle where I was matched with 35-43 year old women in the Mission, meeting in Nob Hill - and meeting Nob Hill women in the age range of 30-38 - was my punishment. I can be a little negative sometimes.

Nevertheless, I was hella nervous to meet these ladies. Parking actually sucks so bad that it took me 40 minutes to find a spot, with an arrival time of 7:20pm when we were to meet at 7pm. Once I parked, I needed to apply lipstick - an act I wish someone was videotaping so they could win a prize and make money on America's Funniest Home Videos. My hand was shaking and I dug about an ounce of gloss out of it's container onto the brush, didn't realize it until I started to try to distribute it evenly over my lips. I looked like the crazy lady hooked on prescription pills. I just plain had to take it all off and start over after taking a few cleansing breaths.

Walking down to The Nook, I had that nutty internal dialogue that usually accompanies the run-up to a first or blind date. Why am I doing this? Would it make me a bad person if I just turned around and went home? What if I don't like any of them?


I gave myself about a millisecond to have a panic attack before I charged in the door and looked for the GFC table tent. I found the ladies quickly, profusely apologized for being late (seriously, I thought they would stone and ostracize me for being late, but they could not have been nicer), and sat down. Just as it is on a first date, once you're over the anxious hump and your ass is in the seat, it's all good.

I would say overall it was a good enough time. Three of the six of us had been to multiple CC's and they really helped us newbies settle in. We discovered that another three of the six of us are married, while the others are not. It was a weird moment because I looked around at the other married girls and immediately felt a class difference. They had engagement rings and wedding bands that were comprised of monstrous and multiple diamond rocks. I then looked more closely at everyone's clothing (this is normal for me) and realized all but two of us were of the Ann Taylor and Banana Republic variety (not that there's anything wrong with that; it's just not me). I thought I'd be the weird one of the group but someone beat me to the punch! I immediately felt more comfortable with the other weirdo present, she who lives in the Haight, goes to circus school, has a little boy and a consulting business she's trying to grow. I'm not sure the feeling was entirely mutual, however... at least there at the little square wine bar in Nob Hill where I probably looked and acted more mainstream than I really am.

Not sure I really felt too much of a connection with any of the girls... maybe just one of them because we talked about Twilight a bit. My therapist has since told me that those are better odds than she would have expected, which made me feel better. I think I expected to walk out with five best friends, or conversely, with five frenemies. (Don't listen to me, I'm nuts.)

With much relief having the CC behind me, I had a laugh at the very random sidewalk art on the way out. That I didn't notice it on the way in is a testament to how nervous I was.


Later at home it was more reality TV time with the second season premiere of Jersey Shore. I have about one friend that would deign to watch this show with me. Nevertheless... pahty's heeeeeeeeeeeh!